Lesser of 2 Evils - A Short Story

Imagine you are exhausted and starving and sit down at a table in a restaurant where the waiter places in front of you 2 plates; A moldy apple with maggots growing inside and a piece of dog poo.

The apple however has been dipped in dark chocolate and has beautiful edible flowers garnishing it.

The dog poo has been dipped in white chocolate, has been covered in caramel and has fresh strawberries around it.

You look around the room and see that most of the people are eating one or the other, with one person in the far back eating out of a bowl.

The waiter tells you all the wonderful things about the chocolates, the flowers, caramel and berries. Over and over again in fact he repeats how wonderful these items are and how “EVERYONE” is eating them without ever mentioning that beneath these items are in fact a moldy apple and a piece of dog poo.

A friend of yours who has been to this restaurant before stands next to you and is telling you exactly what is in them. He’s tried both before so he knows exactly what you’re getting yourself into, but you are SOOO hungry and focused on the plates presented you that you simply can’t imagine how such wretched things are underneath such beautiful garnishing and why EVERYONE would be eating them if they were so awful? The waiter is talking SOOO loud and being very animated that you can’t bring yourself to draw your attention away from what is right there in front of you.

During this whole process, you can sort of make out your friend tell you to look at the end of the table, so you take a quick glance and see a bowl of pasta with butter and a little parmesan on it, also on the table in front of you, but in such a position that you would have to stand up and push the waiter out of the way to reach it.

Now, looking at these 3 options the waiter starts pressuring you to pick between the dark chocolate or the white chocolate. So loud is the waiter that you can hardly hear your friend telling you about how great the pasta actually is, but none the less, you do hear him. You think to yourself, “Surely the waiter would tell me about the pasta if it was actually an option for me to eat right now?” And the waiter presses on, getting a bit angry and louder the longer you take to answer the question, “White or Dark??!! White or Dark??!! Caramel or Strawberries??!!”

You start to look around the walls of the restaurant and see a few old plaques with people sitting in the restaurant eating HUGE bowls of pasta and wonder how moldy apples and poo could have ever gotten on the menu….

You hear the people in the restaurant as well talking about how much they like white chocolate over dark chocolate, or caramel or flowers and yet with each bite they cringe and gag, but continue to go back for more. You briefly see the guy in the back eating out of a bowl looking happy, but also looking confused at the others in the restaurant as though they are out of their minds. You see him whisper to himself, “This pasta is simple, but definitely hits the spot!”

“Which one will it be!!” the waiter demands. “You must make a choice!!” he presses.

Well, which one would you chose????

Now, if you’ve made it this far, check out Framing.

Scroll down a bit and read the section on “Framing in politics”

By not answering the question “White or Dark Chocolate” one is not avoiding the options presented, only the question framed as the reality is the question is incomplete and irrelevant provided the context of the situation. Understanding this, if one is to answer the question “White or Dark?” they would only be able to do so “tongue in cheek” realizing that the answer is pointless.

So, again, which one would you chose? The white or dark chocolate? Or more accurately, the moldy apple with maggots, the dog poo, or the simple bowl of pasta?

I for one would throw the waiter out of the way, take the plates, cut the apple and poo open so that you can clearly see what is inside each and then grab the pasta bowl. I would then walk from table to table, sit down with each person and try and talk to them about the moldy apple w/ maggots or poo in front of them that they are eating. I would offer them a piece of pasta, so they could at least taste what a non poo/moldy item tastes like.

It is very plausible though that those who have been coming to this restaurant over and over again cannot even imagine eating the pasta. Some may even fear it because it is so different than what they are use to. Some may have become so familiar with the apple and poo that they say they actually PREFER it over the pasta, even though they’ve never had pasta before. Very likely, some may even go a step further and try and force me to eat some of their apple or poo and start telling me how great the strawberries are or the wonderful flowers.

The true power here is held by the person FRAMING the conversation. In this case, the waiter. So what’s the best way to encourage more pasta consumption? Become a very loud pasta eater, the chef, or become the waiter!!!